點知佢係咪自戀?108個自戀型人格關鍵字! [FBI教你危險人物 Ep.004]

Ref Book:

Below are the key words:

Abusive, acting, actor, aggressive, amoral, arrogant, articulate,

beguiling, bullshitter, bully, calculating, callous, chameleon, charismatic,

charming, cheat, clever, cold, con man, conniving, contemptuous,

controlling, criminal, cruel, cunning, dangerous, deceitful,

deceptive, dehumanizing, deplorable, dishonest, disingenuous,

disruptive, distracted, domineering, egocentric, evil, exploitative,

fearless, forger, fraud, glib, grandiose, grandiosity, guiltless, hostile,

imposter, inconsiderate, indifferent, infidelity, insensitive, insincerity,

intense, interesting, Intimidating, irksome, irresponsible, Irritable,

irritating, king, lawbreaker, liar, lord, loveless, Machiavellian, manipulative,

mean, mesmerizing, narcissistic, Nazi, noxious, nuisance, parasitic,

peacock, pedophile, player, predator, predatory, preoccupied,

pretender, promiscuous, radiant, rattlesnake, risk-taker, ruler, sarcastic,

seductive, self-centered, shallow, showman, slimy, smooth, snake,

sneaky, superficial, swindler, tactless, temperamental, toxic, two-faced,

tyrant, unapologetic, uncaring, uninterested, unreliable, unscrupulous, unsympathetic, vile, vindictive, witty

自戀者如何一點一點折磨你?5大特徵! [FBI教你危險人物 Ep.003]

Narcissists are not just people who loves to be in the spotlight, they are TOXIC and DANGEROUS people who ONLY care for themselves, their own needs and their priorities.

They desire attention and will manipulate people and situations to get it.

In order to succeed, they may cheat, lie, embellish truths to get ahead, WITHOUT caring how it affects others.

E.g. Cinderella’s stepmother and sisters

-> see no faults in themselves
+ despise/torment those who don’t value them as much

WARNING: Do not confuse narcissism with confidence.

True confidence = strength of personal character

Narcissism = fake confidence, they are arrogance, their character flaw lead to grandiose ideas and desires, AT THE EXPENSE OF OTHERS

Confidence -> happiness for all

Narcissists -> seeks adoration and happiness for HIMSELF, sacrificing others

Big 5 Character Flaws

#1 Egocentric, 一副高高在上,我有權要求一切,我就是世界中心嘅嬰兒心理態度

E.g. make dramatic entrance in events, they tell you they are the smartest, they namedrops to let you know which “high status famous important people”they hangout with

Narcissists MUST look good to others so they are pay extreme attention to their physical appearance.

They love to present themselves as super accomplished, but when things aren’t as smooth, they BLAME others for making him fail.

When they don’t enjoy privileges, they get angry , they berate others, and sometimes become violent.

#2 Overvalue self, devalue others. 踩低人哋抬高自己身價

Because Narcissists see others as inferior, they have no problem becoming a bully, putting ppl down to elevate themselves.

So whenever you witness school bullying or cyberbullying, BE WARNED! Because no matter how charismatic these bullies are, they are the dangerous ones who have narcissistic traits.

Narcissists are good at identifying your weakness/insecurities and ATTACK you to gain superiority. They just don’t care how you feel, they NEED to put you down to “feel good about themselves”.

Q: Have you seen people berating their partner/kids as stupid/incompetent in public places? You found one narcissist.  

#3 零同情心,傲慢,充滿entitlement

Most of us learn to understand ppl’s feelings and will think how our actions affect others, but Narcissists have NO SUCH ABILITY to empathize because their needs/wants/desires are always No.1.

However, some narcissists can PRETEND to empathize. They may seem caring about you at first, but after they have used you as FUNCTIONS, they don’t give a fuck about you anymore.

In short, narcissists just don’t care about you. What they want is that you PAY ATTENTION to them, their needs/desires. They OVERVALUE themselves, UNDERVALUE others, and will do harm to get that without remorse.

#4 行捷徑,扭曲規則,違反界線 Bend Rules

Since narcissists believe they are SUPERIOR like an inborn king, they don’t think they have to work hard to get what they want. They think all rules don’t apply to them and they may take illegal shortcuts.

Narcissists see themselves as the utmost important, they will keep pushing & challenging ppl’s boundaries. So as long as he is happy, he can do anything he wants and he doesn’t care “No or stop” signs from others.

They don’t think this is wrong, they feel ENTITLED. They are pissed when people criticize their inappropriate behaviors and will attack back by berating them.

Most horribly, these narcissists can be successful, famous leaders e.g. priest, basketball coach, teachers who sexually molest kids…

#5 控制狂 Control Freaks

Narcissists seek positions to control others – whether in work or relationships. They use their ranks and status to take care of themselves.

And they exist in the legal, medicine, politics world because they want power/authority to use others to help themselves.

If you get into a relationship with narcissists, they will TORTURE your emotions because you are just a piece of shit that he’s using to make himself feel superior.

Classic example: Neil Strauss in <Game> with his ex gf, hosting a party and saying to each other “look at how much superior we are as a couple”.

膽小勿進…揭露4大危險人物特徵! [FBI教你危險人物 Ep.002]

壞人的意圖不會寫在臉上,而且只有百分之一的罪犯會被繩之以法……

當法律和執法者來不及保護你時,以下這四種最常見的危險人格你該如何辨認?做些甚麼?才能確保生命與財產的安全。

4種危險人格: 自戀型人格(narcissistic personality)

情緒不穩型人格(emotionally unstable personality)

偏執型人格(paranoid personality)

獵食者人格(predator)

Book Reference: <Dangerous Personalities> by Joe Navarro

#1 自戀者,一點一點折磨你,偏偏法律難以約束: 控制狂、霸凌者、糟蹋人、詐欺犯、宗教領袖

自戀型人格(narcissistic personality)

自戀不等於自信,而是傲慢

一副高高在上——我有權要求一切

這種人比例攀升,難怪霸凌頻傳

傲慢、予取予求,毫無同情心

調戲狂、詐欺犯、猥褻孩童者都是此型人格

愛上控制狂,想分手會讓你笑不出來

他們會一點一點折磨你,偏偏法律難以約束

這種人常說:「這些年要不是我,你怎麼可能——」,靠貶低別人獲得優越感。

這種父母把孩子當自我延伸,期望看到最完美結果,並堅稱一切都是為你好。

這類領導者,像是邪教領袖,常以宗教為幌子,要求信徒無條件交托性命。

#2 敢愛敢恨?其實是情緒炸彈: 瞬間變臉、耍賴、威脅自殘、打我卻說愛我
情緒不穩型人格(emotionally unstable personality)

完全無法掌控自己的情緒,情緒不穩型人格

極度敏感,害怕被人遺棄

他們的思考是:不是朋友就是敵人,這種人會公然測試你的忠誠度:「你支持我還是支持她?你站在誰那邊?」

擅長耍賴,讓「不行」變「好吧」,自殺或自殘不過只是威脅手段。

追求感官刺激,只為了感受活著

他們聲稱最愛的人,最常被攻擊

情緒來了,就會亂砸毀壞物品、打人或嚴厲懲罰孩子,完全無法控制。

#3 認為誰都不可信的偏執人格: 你的看法他都貶抑、對每一份工作都不滿、日常行蹤總是搞神祕

偏執型人格(paranoid personality)

永遠以猜疑眼光看待外界

疑神疑鬼、怕東怕西、遮遮掩掩

堅持己見,性好爭論,容易記仇

難以平復舊傷,性好記恨

因為不相信任何人,這種人會要求家人棄絕所有社交活動。

極度保護自己,不會與伴侶或朋友交心

他們找得到工作,卻是辦公室不滿分子;易怒、愛比較,只要同事在說悄悄話,他們會以為是在說自己的壞話。

萬一成為領導者或官員,他們的恐懼與憎恨常常促成大屠殺!

#4 持續犯案,毫無悔意的獵食者: 黑心商人、慣犯、啃老族、吃軟飯、騙錢的親友

獵食者人格(predator)

獵食者不斷犯案,只是不知道誰下一個受害

欠缺同情,毫無悔意,沒有良心 -》獵食者與獵物,沒有平等可言

冷酷、無情、精算、控制

索求無度、毫無自制、欠缺自省

這種人精於哄騙、誘惑和道歉,把別人耍得團團轉。

只要能滿足欲望,不擇手段,完全不管別人會遭殃。

要求家人做保,或進行一些看不出前景的投資,卻毫不在乎家人下場。

#5 複合型危險人格 – 兼具兩種的人可怕,三位一體更要命!

複合型人格,其實一點也不罕見…

「敵人虎視眈眈,只有我知道殲敵方案」:偏執/自戀

「看好了,只要我想做,沒什麼不可以」:自戀者/獵食者

四種危險人格:大開殺戒!

危險人物相互交流,破壞力加倍!

#6 面對以上這四種危險人物,我們該如何保護自己?

◎ 每天可以做的準備:利用本書內附的危險人格查核表、關鍵字表,提醒自己該觀察什麼。

相信直覺:這人給你什麼感覺?討喜不等於善良,差多了。

注意時間和地點,每天下午四點到凌晨兩點,是暴力事件最容易發生的時段。

保持距離,就算對方是家人也一樣

向親朋好友示警,請求專業人士幫忙,別不好意思。

擬定脫身計畫,並且存錢應急,不動聲色準備脫身。

如果無法立馬閃人,將被害行為歸類建檔,存證有備無患。

A lot more details will be revealed in coming episodes!

全新系列: 如何識別身邊隱藏的危險人物!? [FBI教你危險人物 Ep.001]

Name of the book we’ll discuss: <Dangerous Personalities> by Joe Navarro

FBI教你認出身邊隱藏的危險人物:生活中那些一點一點折磨你的人,以及惡意的陌生人,你事前都能防範自保

Why I wanna share this book?

Because we ALL have or will encounter one or more of these DANGEROUS personalities in our life – family members, gfs, wife, friends, professional workers etc.

These ppl are flawed in character, they lack consciousness, they are TOXIC ppl who WILL HARM YOU deliberately and make you suffer.

I want this series of videos help you recognize these dangerous ppl, prevent them in your life and know how to effectively deal with them if you inevitably encounter them.

This will save you from being injured – physically, mentally, emotionally, financially – and save you from being murder, rape, thief, bully or exploit!

Why Joe Navarro wrote this book?

Because over 4 decades, he learnt that there are certain personalities that HURT PEOPLE MOSt and they exist in our daily lives!

Maybe we have heard a lot of massive killings in America’s schools, and the media might only report these massive killings,

but most of us are NOT aware of those small killing incidents where dangerous personalities kill ppl ONE AT A TIME!

These ppl exist in schools, church, home, office, governments!

殺人案、家庭暴力、 竊案、搶案,性騷擾案,這些案子很多都是這種危險分子犯下的,而且多數沒有報案,也沒有判刑。

Have you been stolen sth b4? Did sb hurtfully  exploit you?

Were you bullied at school or at work? Were you sexually abused in the past but you never mention it?

犯罪學家60年來的研究顯示,犯下案件並遭到法律制裁的罪犯不到百分之一!

這個數字告訴我們,這些傷害我們的危險分子,絕大多數有辦法逃過公權力的檢視,他們肆意摧毀我們的生活,卻安然無事,甚至連續犯案多年才終於束手就擒。

So Joe 經過努力查訪以及他人的指點,找出了幾種人格習於欺騙與操控,人品低下,以利用他人為樂,視法律為無物,對他人毫無尊重。

這些人容易情緒耗竭,待人殘酷、粗魯無情、予取予求。這些行為會一再反覆,他們帶給別人精神與肉體的折磨,自己卻毫無感覺,也毫不在乎。

Hard Lesson: 危險人格極善於隱藏。他們看起來就像凡夫俗子,行為正常,而且有些人甚至相當討喜,聰明伶俐,風趣幽默,非常有魅力。然而他們的危險性格始終存在。

這種人物的問題不只是人格,還包括品德,也就是道德與倫理的缺陷。精確來說,你絕不能相信他們,這些人不說實話,不在意你,更不可能保護你的安全。

隨著時間累積,Joe逐漸歸納出4 種危險人格,他們每天都可能讓你遭受各種形式的損失,包括精神、肉體、財務。

Are you fully IN or NOT?

So bro, dangerous personalities people are EVERYWHERE, you will be tormented  if you don’t know how to sense the danger and observe behaviors.

Most people are blind, you can only rely on yourself to save yourself.

I want to share Joe’s expert knowledge so that you can PREVENT ppl from hurting you, whether new friends, colleagues, or the girl you just met.

In the coming episodes, you will learn these Big 4 dangerous personalities one-by-one, you’ll know how they behave and make you feel, you’ll have a checklist to look for behavioral signs of toxic people.

This book is NOT to help you become a clinical psychologist to understand the WHYs,

BUT you will have the assessment tools to identify DP’s behaviors and keep yourself and loved ones SAFE.

So do you want to get these powerful FBI tools to stay safe when you go out socializing and attracting girls?

Do you want to prevent being physically/psychologically fvcked up by true evil people?

Comment below if you have ever encountered DANGEROUS people in your life!