偏執人格如何威脅摧毀你?[FBI教你危險人物 Ep.018]

Book Ref:

#1 極度保護自己,不會與伴侶或朋友交心

逐漸疏遠周遭嘅人,一點一滴耗盡別人的善意,耐心,愛心。

佢會榨乾你生活嘅快樂,令你神經緊張,擔驚受怕,煩躁易怒,帶俾你心理層面嘅傷害,令你『情緒崩潰』。

Why?=> 因為佢要你睇到佢眼中嘅敵人,要你feel到相同程度嘅恐懼,感同身受,否則你就有問題,你就係佢哋眼中嘅敵人。

佢只會關注其他事,不在乎你的希望與慾望。

你無辦法深入佢耐心世界,也不可能贏得信任,you, his/her family, therapsts or police。

#2 逼你改變現有嘅生活方式,令你不斷調整自己,改變實屈步伐去配合偏執者。

不可理喻,愛爭論,要你採納佢哋嘅信念,透過佢嘅角度看待世界,就算你不願意。

E.g. seek extreme isolation, prepare for 世界末日,force you to follow 邪教

#3 在偏執人嘅眼中,四處都係危機四伏,所以喺佢哋身上你唔會攞到熱情嘅親密關係。

佢哋可能會以自己方式去照顧你,但真正嘅心力,都係放喺猜疑別人想法;

佢地極度保護自己,所以唔會交心,同佢哋傾計都係原地打轉,非常表面單一面向。

任何形式衝突 = 攻擊,無法接受正常關係中的起復。

#4 約會時,佢會評估你係咪順從嘅人,願意附和佢嘅思考邏輯。

佢會挑選一啲毫無懷疑嘅人,唔會質疑批判自己嘅人;等到二人結合後,就會開始出現問題。

#5 要求你放棄所有社交活動,將你從家人朋友中隔絕,因為理由係『邊個都唔可以信』

如果佢哋有朋友嘅話,多數都係一啲古怪奇特嘅同類型『狂熱份子』,打扮舉止信念都一樣。

#6 很多組織都有paranoid,但高功能嘅人。

如果有工作,佢哋會經常懷疑公司嘅管理方式/決策制定/點解自己升唔到職,經常不滿,甚至公然挑釁或者密謀造反,提升不滿氣氛。

就算工作做得不錯,都會易怒,愛比較,唱反調,怨言不斷;見到同事靜靜雞傾計,就會覺得佢哋講自己。

#7 當踏上領導位置,佢哋嘅威脅就係超乎想像,因為歷史好多悲劇都係出自於偏執人嘅懷疑,舉行,憎恨。

E.g. 史太林Stalin,希特拉Hilter,柬埔寨獨裁者Pol Pot波爾布特;害怕不存在嘅敵人,要求支持者毫無理由地防範呢啲想像嘅敵人,否則處死。

殺害人數3000萬,超過500萬,超過120萬 respectively。

Conclusion:偏執人持續破壞人與人嘅穩定關係,撕裂信任,破壞和諧-兩性家庭/公司/社區/國家,do you have a paranoid person around you?

受害者親述:偏執人格186個關鍵字![FBI教你危險人物 Ep.017]

Book Ref:

Adversarial, alarmist, alone, aloof, angry, apocalyptical, apprehensive, armed, aroused, assertive, barricaded, biased, bigoted, bluffer, boastful, cagey, calculating, callous, cantankerous, careful, cautious, circumspect, cold, combative, complainer, confused, confusing, contemptuous, contentious, contrarian, control freak, controlling, cracked, crackpot, crank, crazy, creepy, critical, cruel, crusty,

daft, defensive, delusional, demanding, demented, deranged, difficult, disbeliever, distrustful, disturbed, doubtful, draining, dry, eccentric, envious, erratic, evasive, extremist, fanatic, fearful, fixated, flake, fruit-cake, fussy, grandiose, guarded, gullible, hard-headed, hater, hates, haughty, hidden, hiding, high strung, hostile, hubris, hypercritical, hypersensitive,

impossible, impressionable, incredulous, inflexible, inhospitable, injured, insular, Intolerant, irascible, irrational, irritable, isolated, jealous, know-it-all, kook, lame brain, leery, liar, litigious, loco, loner, loon, loony, lunatic, mad, maniac, mean, menacing, mental, millennialist, mistrustful, mobilized,

narrow-minded, nasty, neurotic, nonconformist, nut, nuts, nutty, obdurate, obscene, obsessed, obsessive, odd, offensive, opinionated, out, overcritical, overly sensitive, peculiar, perplexing, persecuted, pessimistic, picky, prejudiced, prickly, provocative, psycho,

quarrelsome, querulous, questioning, radical, rebel, recluse, remorseless, repulsive, rigid, scary, self-Important, skeptical, squirrely, startled, stiff, strict, stubborn, survivalist, suspicious,

tense, terse, testy, threatening, touched, touchy, treacherous, trigger-happy, truculent, “truther,” unbalanced, unbelieving, unbending, uncompromising, uncultured, unforgiving, ungenerous, unromantic, unstable, unwavering, unwelcoming, unwell, unyielding, uptight, victim, victimized, vindictive, wary, watchful, weird, whiner, withdrawn, worried, zealot.

點解偏執型人格咁痴線?4大原因![FBI教你危險人物 Ep.016]

Book Ref:

<Dangerous Personalities> by Joe Navarro

#1 永遠以猜疑眼光看待世界

These ppl are always full of suspicions. They think ppl are trying to harm him.

So when they interact with you, they want you to listen and VALIDATE his/her beliefs/信仰, and when you don’t, they suspect you are a threat as well.

They may be quiet/reserved/shy, but they can also be loud/好勇鬥狠,they may show up in demonstrations and become violent e.g. damage cars & properties.

Again, what drives them is irrational fear/毫無理性嘅恐懼。To Tthem,高度仇恨與恐懼,就係令生命有意義同目標。

#2 疑神疑鬼,怕東怕西,遮遮掩掩

因為極度猜疑,所以會毫無根據地監控別人言行舉止,衡量對方是否有邪惡意圖。

他們社交上十分怠慢,喜歡保持神秘,不願透露自己的事,甚至說謊掩飾自己行蹤與真實意圖,連家人都不相信。

They can fear anything e.g. ppl from certain countries/ethnicity, food source, neighbor, animals, technology, government, boss, new colleague, insurance company, emails etc.

因為多疑,他們甚至會記錄其他人的行蹤,或者製造敵人名單去保護自己。

#3 堅持己見,好勝爭論

健全健康嘅人 -> 可以適應新情況,擁抱新觀念,因環境改變,可以理解別人不同的立場與信念

Paranoid -> 不理會邏輯與實證,只會憑自己的洞察力去爭論;When you disagree, you are an enemy

選擇性扭曲歷史,將無關事件和想法串埋一齊,塑造自己觀點,理直氣壯同你拗。

Dangerous distorted beliefs:

E.g. If I kill enough scientists, I’ll stop the advance of technology.

E.g. 拉登 “If I kill enough Americans, the US will leave the Middle East.”

#4 難以平復舊傷患,好記仇

會狠狠記住過去的傷痛,你任何的無心之失,就算惡意,佢都會覺得你留下污點,缺乏忠誠嘅指標,不會原諒你。

當你成為敵人,佢就會理直氣壯採取行動:避開你,背後暗算你,密謀反對你,破壞摧毀屬於你嘅嘢,甚至殺害你。

So these paranoids 一點一滴收集舊傷患,然後利用呢啲材料為報仇藉口。

E.g. Laden used 十一世紀十字軍東征,合理化911

E.g. Hitler used 2000年前嘅猶太人嘅歷史傷口,作為報仇。

Next week,

We’ll talk about the 關鍵字 + how they affect us.

你條女邊個都唔相信?佢有偏執型人格![FBI教你危險人物 Ep.015]

Book Ref:

<Dangerous Personalities> by Joe Navarro

Have you ever encountered girls who are extremely fearful, always be on the guard, super protective about herself, always thinking “world is ending”, and no matter how close you are with her, she just NEVER TRUSTS you?

If yes, congrats because you’ve met a person with Paranoid Personality, which is the 3rd type of dangerous personalities in this book.

#1 In short, people with paranoid personalities are those 充滿非理性嘅懷疑同恐懼。

充滿猜忌,思考僵化,蠻不講理,愛批評,充滿偏見,神經緊張,過度提防別人,覺得人哋做所有嘢都係『別有用心』。

額外特質:容易被侮辱,好爭論,妒忌,心懷舊怨恨,質疑他人動機,挑戰規則,充滿恐懼與厭惡,討厭唔同自己嘅人。

#2 You are surrounded by these people:

E.g. Driver thinks you cut him off intentionally, then  keep horning/headlight flashing or even follow you home.

E.g. Your friend who thinks every guy is trying to fvck his gf/wife, and keep mate guarding her.

E.g. 勁抱怨其他人升職加薪,但自己冇份嘅人

E.g. 每個星期都喺政府部門抱怨大罵,威脅要訴訟嘅人

E.g. 網上匿名嘅攻擊,指控你做某啲嘢立心不良

E.g. 過去舊同事或舊女友因為不滿待遇不公,無啦啦身懷兇器上office搞大件事嘅人

E.g. 覺得自己懷才不遇嘅知識分子,跟住向世界報復嘅人

#3 簡單講,呢啲人唔單止性情古怪,佢哋更會被非理性嘅恐懼與懷疑而驅使自己行動;

佢哋喺一啲反應過敏,容易被冒犯嘅人;一旦被激怒/拒絕/羞辱,佢哋就會好可能進行極端嘅報復。

If + narcissism, 暴力就會提升,『擋我者死』地清除威脅。

So they are hard to treat, because they don’t think they have problem; and they SUSPECT people’s intentions who try to help.

That’s the intro to paranoid personality.

In our next video, we’ll talk about the 4 big traits of how they behave so that you can be ALERTED when they appear in your life!

情緒不穩人如何變態玩殘你?[FBI教你危險人物 Ep.012]

Book Ref:

<Dangerous Personalities> Joe Navarro

#1 Since they are extremely needy + worship you, you will feel mentally & emotionally drained by their constant ups and downs outbursts.

The closer you get with them, the more they will ATTACK you while they say they love you.  => 焦慮症,嚴重抑鬱。

#2 They may escalate verbal to physical violence E.g. destroy things, hit/slap you, harshly punish children.

Why? Because they are extremely afraid of being ABANDONED.

If you can’t have you, they will make sure others can’t have you…CREEPY!

#3 They really wish to merge with you, so they flirt heavily and SEX might be mind blowing and you as a man might get addicted.

But again, they are super emotionally needy, they want you to be extremely loyal so they might HARASS you via parents/frds/social media. They will stalk you, they will scold you public to make sure you don’t leave.

So narccissts want 主導地位,but emotional unstable ppl want STABILITY and want to feel ADORED. But even if they get what they want from you, they still have an EMPTINESS you cannot fill. Thus super demanding.

#4 Bro, have you experienced anyone like that? Parents? Boss? Girl?

Parents -> damage kids psychological health -> Effect: repressed emotions, ignored needs, expect to be hurt, can’t say no, won’t stand up for himself, feel useless and worthless…-> might become bully to 先發制人 -> might want your parents die

Boss -> Devil Wears Prada Miranda -> Impossible to work with, because you can’t please her, you can just survive. -> you never get acknowledgement, you are scared to report bad news…

Girls -> She might give you crazy sex, you might want to stay there to fvck her. But you’ll find that she is super unstable, almost crazy emotionally, you want to fix her problems but it is NOT possible. So when you encounter these crazy bitches, LEAVE & don’t even fvck her. She will find ways to destroy you when you stay.

#5 Conclusion: Most cases happen in private closed doors, so they are relationship destroyers.

If you notice sb who violates social boundaries, is super temperamental, causes people to feel inferior, who easily argue & fight for small stuff… ALERT!

情緒不穩有咩症狀?174個關鍵字![FBI教你危險人物 Ep.011]

Book Ref:

<Dangerous Personalities> by Joe Navarro

Abnormal, alluring, aloof, angry, ass, asshole, atomic, beguiling, bewildering, bitch, bitter, borderline, calamitous, catastrophic, chameleon, chaotic, clingy, cold, complainer, complex, conflict, confusing, conniving, consternation, controlling, coquettish, crazy, creepy, critical, criticizes, cruel, cunning,

dangerous, deceptive, dehumanizing, dejected, delusional, demanding, demeaning, denigrating, depressed, depressive, desperate, despondent, destructive, disconnected, disillusioned, disorganized, disquieting, distant, diva, draining, dramatic, dysfunctional, emotional, empty, envious, erratic, exasperating, exciting, exhausting, explosive, fearful, flirt, flirtatious, freaky, frightening, frustrated, frustrating, histrionic, horrendous, horrible, hysterical,

imbalanced, impossible, impulsive, inappropriate, incomplete, inconsistent,incredible, instability, intense, intricate, irrational, irresponsible, irritable, irritating, lascivious, lecherous, lethal, liar, lies, lively, loca, loco, lustful, malevolent, malignant, masochistic, mean, mercurial, miserable, moody, morbid, nasty, negativistic, neglectful, neurotic, nuts, nutty, nymphomaniac,

odd, painful, perplexing, pitiful, prick, problematic, psycho, queen, rage, relentless, resentful, risky, sadistic, salacious, sarcastic, scary, schemer, seductive, seductress, seesaw, seething, sexual, sexy, short-fused, sick, sickening, special, stalker, storm, suffocating, suicidal,

tantrums, temperamental, tempestuous, tense, threatening, tiresome, tormented, tormentor, torn, tornado, trainwreck, tumultuous, turbulent, unappreciative, unbridled, uncaring, undependable, unforgiving, ungrateful, unhappy, unhinged, unpredictable, unreasonable, unreliable, unstable, untrusting, unyielding, vengeful, victim, vindictive, violent, vixen, volatile, weird, whirlwind, wicked.