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Hey brother/sister, do you know that no matter how good/bad your childhood was, it is going to affect your love & relationship life?

 

No matter whether your parents took care of you OR never took care of you, our childhood experience WILL influence what kinds of partners we attract in a romantic relationship.

 

#1 Why? It’s because as a child, we are helpless and ego-centric.

 

On one hand, we crave love & attention from our primary caretakers;

 

On the other hand, our naive self believe that every +ve/-ve reactions from others MUST be because of you.

 

If they treat you good, you think “Me = Good”.

 

If they treat you bad/negligent, you think “Me = bad”and something is wrong with you.

 

#2 Do you know why EVERY human being is fvcked up by their parents?

 

It’s because even though you have the BEST parents in the world, they are gonna do sth unconscious that make you conclude that you are NOT good enough.

 

E.g. Daddy comes home, you want to play with him, he said too tired and go watch TV, YOU conclude that you are NOT lovable.

 

E.g. You broke a vase, mum gave you a quick angry look and said you are so naughty to do that, you conclude YOU = BAD = NOT lovable  

 

So little innocent acts from our caretakers will easily make kids conclude that they are NOT good enough.

 

#3 What do kids do then?

 

Because of fear of abandonment, we develop a series of survival mechanism.

 

Maybe we tried to achieve good grades to get our parents attention…

Maybe we withdrew as a hermit and play computer games alone to avoid rejection…

Maybe we intentionally behaved badly just to get their attention…

 

No matter how we adapt, we start to force our identity to behave in certain ways in order to get love and approval.

 

And that’s how we develop extreme good boys/extreme bad boys traits to survive in childhood.

 

How about you brother?

 

Which strategy did you use?

 

Can you see how such identity shaping will affect what kind of women you attract?

 

Feel free to share your story and we’ll start to see why we behave in certain ways today as an adult.

Like and Share this video if you think it’s valuable to others, if you want to dive deeper in this topic, let me know.

Are you aware that our biggest enemy is always ourselves?

 

And one common mistake we all do is to CRITICIZE ourselves too harshly that eventually hurts our self-esteem.

 

So let me ask you: Do you love yourself? Can you extend your kindness and love towards your ownself?

 

If you crave happiness, connection, emotional strength and love in the world, you gotta stop being an asshole to yourself and love yourself more FULLY everyday.

 

#1 Meet the basic needs of yourself first

 

E.g. Full night sleep, eat nutritious food, train your body at least 3 times a week

 

If you overload your body with crap, your life is crap!

 

#2 Don’t ignore your emotions

 

Everytime we ignore our certain emotions and just “deal with life”, that ignored emotions will always come back STRONGER to make you pay attention to it.

 

E.g. Ignored stress -> anxiety ->panic attacks.

Ignored frustration-> anger-> rage.

Ignored sadness -> numbness ->depression.

 

Listen to your body and what your emotions are telling you.

 

They are signals on things you should or shouldn’t do MORE!

 

#3 Observe how you critize others

How you treat others externally often reflects how you treat yourself internally.

If you judge others harshly, you also judge yourself harshly when you feel bad.

 

So learn how to treat people with KINDNESS.

We don’t always know what others are going through.

Instead of judging so quickly, step back and be curious WHY they behave in certain ways.

That’s a little known way that helps you love yourself as well.

Society conditions us to believe that men don’t have any emotional needs from a woman.

 

Well, if you believe that shit, no wonder there are more and more men are suffering from depression due to a bad intimate relationship.

 

Men: Understand what you actually need from a woman

Women: Understand these, give to your man so that he loves you more

 

Here’s the top 3 needs men need to have in a relationship:

 

#1 To feel admired/appreciation from a woman

 

Yes, mature men don’t NEED that or RELY on others to pat themselves.

 

But hey, men still feel good when he is the HERO for you and he loves when she ADMIRES his effort.

 

So women, tell him you love how hot he looks without clothes, how attractive he is when he smiles at you positively & warmly, how seductive he is when he gives you that look that make you wet!

 

#2 To feel that his woman is open and playful

 

It is frustrating to men when a woman is closed off and doesn’t want to communicate.

 

We feel like a failure when we try to make you happy but only to receive a cold feedback OR NO feedback from you.

Yes I know strong men will eventually find a way to OPEN you, but that doesn’t mean you should use that to manipulate him into begging you.

 

So girls, be OPEN and PLAYFUL and men will love seeing your beautiful butterfly dance!

 

#3 To feel FREE

 

If you want a man to STAY in a relationship, give him FREEDOM & LOVE and don’t try to CONTROL him!

Masculine men need independence, they need their alone time to recover, to focus and get shit done.

 

If you don’t give him alone time/ hobby time/ bro time, you will suffocate the relationship.

 

Let him breathe, let him roar, let him FOCUS on his mission and he will COME back to you with glory!

How can we balance striving for future success while still being joyful in the present moment?

 

For men, it’s relatively for us to aim for that $1M/month, that 6-pack abs, that problem-free relationship with a hot model and achieve one things after another as if you are checking a to-do-list box.

 

While it’s a masculine thing to be driven, hitting goals and shooting for the Mars, if you aren’t CONTENT with what you have already done and CONTENT with the present moment and the journey, your life will be fucking miserable.

 

Just like many famous celebrities in history (Robin Williams/ Marilyn Monroe/ MJ/ Leslie Cheung/ Danny Chan), they seem to HAVE IT ALL – money, fame, women, achievements, they seem to be making EVERYONE in the world happy, but they fail to make themselves joyful and fulfilled and it’s SAD that they killed themselves.

 

So how can we be HAPPY with ourselves NOW, while we want more in life?

 

#1 Give yourself a break/rejuventation time regularly

 

Without optimal health & fitness, you can’t achieve your big goals.  

 

But even if you never miss your ROUTINE, sometimes it’s OKAY to say FVCK IT and eat that delicious meal and indulge in some pleasures.

 

Don’t be guilty because you have EARNED that right to 放縱一下自己, getting 2% body fat back from 8% isn’t going to make you less hot.

 

#2 Don’t neglect your dating life or intimate relationship

 

The longest Harvest study in human history “The Grant Study” discovered that “Our relationships and how happy we are in our relationships has a powerful influence on our health.”

 

+ ““Loneliness kills. It’s as powerful as smoking or alcoholism.”

 

+ “When the study began, nobody cared about empathy or attachment. But the key to healthy aging is relationships, relationships, relationships.”

 

So are you taking PROACTIVE action to meet, attract and keep that person with you?

 

#3 Slow the fvck down and schedule your FUN ENJOYMENT time

 

We live in a fvcked up achievement-driven “successful” hardworking modern 1st-tier city, but researches & studies have again and again proved that many first world citizens are NOT happy with that lives, while many poorer ppl are happier.

 

I am not suggesting not to make that 500K/month, I am suggesting instead of striving to accumulate more traditional “success symbols” – house, cars, women, children -,

 

maybe you should reconsider what TRUE SUCCESS & HAPPINESS in your own fvcking terms.

 

Get the fuck out of this city and see the world as it is, and see how DIFFERENT it is than what you are SOLD in the fvcking media.

 

Change your environment regularly, and what you believe is a “good life” will be changed constantly.

Let’s be honest guys, if you are addicted to ejaculating with porn, you are fvcked and you are doomed to be a fvcking loser.

 

Understand: Your sexual energy/drive is your most precious & powerful form of energy that you can use to do great things.

 

You EITHER submit to the fvcking porn OR you harness that drive to make your life legendary.

 

Your sex energy is what makes you a productive, driven & attractive man.

So here’s how to overcome such addiction:

Everyone has their masculine & feminine energy, and each of these energies have their weakness/blind spots.

 

#1 Masculine energy is driven, directional, single-focused, strict.

 

It’s like a laser beam, it can penetrate things, but it can also burn things around.  E.g. a very driven successful businessman who makes a lot of money, but he completely neglect his wife and children

 

So masculine weakness = too caught up in DOING/ACHIEVING but isn’t living life fully, they aren’t experiencing enjoyment

 

#2 Feminine Energy is flexible, creative, nuturing, flowing.

 

It’s like a hurricane power, if it is not guided, it can be destructive and turn things into chaos and suffering.

 

Thus, while masculine energy cherish time to get shit done, feminine enjoy being in the moment without much directionality.

 

#3 If your core is masculine, you feel alive when ppl challenge you to accomplish a goal. But if your core is feminine, you feel alive when you relax and enjoy yourself.

 

The point is: Neither energy is more right/valuable than the other. We need both in ourselves (80/20) while staying in our CORE and attracting a partner in THEIR CORE.

 

100% masculine male can be a ruthless dictator, 100% feminine can be someone who indulge in pleasure lalaland.

Be aware of where your energy is, and be aware of why you attract the partner you have today, because sexual attraction is very much about this energy play between you two.

To grow from a boy psychology to man psychology, you need to understand the difference between them.

Below are 3 ways on how you can grow the fvck up and become a man in your thoughts and actions!

Full details here:

Whether you are a man or woman, have you heard of these phrases “Men are liars, men are so stupid, men only want sex?”

 

Here are 3 common myths women have about men, and if you don’t get rid of them, you will never be aware of men’s struggles in his cultural conditioning and see his pain, and he will never feel you understand him.

 

And for men, if you find that these 3 myths resonate with you, leave a comment below and let me know.

Full Episode Here:

One of the biggest mistake men make during conversation is acting like a stupid clown.

You may think “Let me do this to keep her entertained!

Let me brag about my success and status so that she knows I am the deal!

Let me keep joking around so that she laughs continously!”

 

But reality is, this is the quickest way to lose a woman. Why?

 

That’s what we’re gonna discuss today.

 

(Plus some goodies about HOW to be a great conversationalist with women as a MAN)

 

Full Episode Here: