分類: 人生

One of the most common fears guys tell me is that they think “你的樣子如何你的日子也必如何”, so they think they can never get girls because they have average looks.

I am not gonna lie, your fashion/style/sexiness DOES matter because first impression lasts. Look at how thirsty women are when they got a chance to touch A&F models.

But does that really mean average looks = lonely forever? And do you know why you are force fed this idea of “Your face your fate”?

Can you see how believing into such bullshit is going to affect your mindset, action and results in life? CM below and let know your thoughts.

So if you ask me, I’d say fvck YFYF because there are certain things you can do to drastically increase your chance.

#1 If you are really worried, then get your ass out and change what you can.

Let’s face this, if you dress like like a dirty beggar OR like a safe boring vanilla good boy, that is NOT going to arouse women.

Arousal of women is based on TENSION, so your style needs to conveys edginess +I am not fvcking average. If your presentation conveys “I am safe and risk-averse”, that will NOT spark attraction.

So always upgrade your haircut, your style that is not based on fashion but timeless good-looks, your body type, your smell, your skin, your body type.

Those are the easy things that you can DO to change ppl’s perception.

#2 Whatever beliefs you keep telling yourself or excuses you keep using , you are going to live in such reality.

Once you have taken ACTION to change the external and stop behaving like a keyboard poison kid, then you gotta take charge of your self-talk.

Because when you repeat a story in your brain, your mind are going to focus on finding evidence that only support that belief and reject evidence that doesn’t support that.

This is called Confirmation bias 確認偏誤。

#3 So knowing that our brain has a tendency to 選擇性地回憶, why don’t you use that bias to HELP YOURSELF?

Assuming you HAVE taken action to change your style/body/external factors, you SHOULD create a new story like “I love how girls love how sexy I am.””Women just love how hot I am and they want me to talk to them. ”

Instead of being biased against the -ve factors about yourself, you can use the same tool to be biased FOR the +ve factor about yourself.

I agree that good-looks, especially for women, have tremendous effects on how people judge you. And I also agree that sometimes you may overestimate your hotness.

But if nothing change, you now at least have the BALLS to pull the fucking trigger and say hi to the girls you have always scared to meet.

Doesn’t this just simple act increase your success with women?  

2 NEW announcements of MTFU’s directions! 😀

Knowing that you are about to break up with someone you’ve been together for a while can be SCARY, because most of us don’t want to make others feel sad or even cry.  

But if you know that your relationship isn’t going anywhere in the future, there are few guidelines you can use to make breakups as peaceful as possible.

#1 Do it in person

Sudden silence/disappearance & stop calling/texting is VERY immature way of breakup kids do, that’s disrespectful to the other person .

So do it in person, have a sincere chat and that will help BOTH of you grow and move on ASAP.

#2 Tell her what you are grateful for in the relationship

If you are conscious about your relationship and have developed it from a healthy foundation, both of you are going to learn A LOT from each other.

So it’s good to APPRECIATE how she has helped you grow as a person, and she has been played an important role in a chapter of your life.

#3 Let her know the logical reason for the breakup

A good breakup should include some thoughtful contemplations on whether the relationship is going anywhere.

So if you think your values/goals/personalities/directions/timing are not COMPATIBLE with each other,

if you two are going different paths, it is a better decision to separate your ways and let each other FLY with freedom.

#4 It is crucial that both of you STOP communicating for a long time.

This is because we must create mental space for each other to eliminate old anchors by each other in order to move on.

A good time frame is if r/p is 2 years, it takes around a year to recover.

You two can still be friends in the future, but that only happen organically if you DELETE/CUT her phone, FB, stuff to provide a clear mental space NOW.

=> Be thankful, be real, own the responsibility, end it if you know it’s not right

We know that being vulnerable requires emotional courage, because letting ppl come close and see your flawed imperfect self is scary and can hurt you if you choose a wrong person to do so.

How do we protect ourselves while doing that?

#1 First thing to remember: We don’t NEED everyone to see the deepest, realest part of you.

Not everyone DESERVES to see that deep truth, and not everyone is INTERESTED to explore you.

So while we are being real, we give people freedom to go as deep as they want and freedom to stop at certain level.  

When you come from a place of total self-acceptance and self-love, we WON”T need others to validate us that“Oh, you really are flawed but I accept you”.

#2 You have to be choosy as who you slowly allow to enter your heart.

From your interactions with them, you need to see if they are a trustworthy, non-judgemental, patient, compassionate, kind-hearted person who has your best interest at their heart.

If they are supportive to your growth with open heart, then these people has earned their right to receive your invitation to go deep.

If they shame you for being/doing certain things, they are NOT safe people to open up.

#3 This applies to every kind of relationship – bf/gf, friendships, or you seek help from therapist or personal coaching.

The purpose of these “vulnerability sessions” is to help you heal from your emotional wounds in the past,

to let go of the toxic shame that controls you, and to reintegrate your disowned selves back to your personality.

So if you need help to open up, if you are scared about certain fears but you don’t know why,

if you have difficulties connecting with women, you are welcome to send an email to support@manthefvck.com to book a coaching session with me,

OR join our community MTFU Insider to learn and grow together as an integrated healthy male so that you become more attractive, powerful and confident human being.

It is safe, loving, compassionate evn where you will receive support in your journey.

I was recently having lunch with an old friend who is very successful in society’s standard – very wealthy, make multiple millions, have a great pretty gf, can travel anywhere anytime he wants –

and we stumbled upon the discussion on how to know whether our goals are SOMETHING WE REALLY WANT instead of what people want for us?

Take a second to think about this:  Is your goal right now something YOU want, OR society/marketing forces tells you to want it?

Your next car? Your next house? Your job? Your girlfriend? Your possessions? Your places to go because you heard it can take nice pics for your IG?

Then, we discussed the 1 Q we can ask ourselves to distinguish the REAL thing and the FAKE thing, and that is…

“If no one in the world knows what you do/ what you have, OR if you cannot show off what you do/what you have to the world, would you still continue doing it?”

Boom, can you see how liberating this Q is?

E.g. If you can’t show off that Red Ferrari or green Lamborghini to the world, would you still try to own it?

If you can’t show off this HOT SEXY MODEL to the world, would you still choose to attract her, keep her as a girlfriend OR like hanging around with her?

If you can’t tell your parents/relatives that you are a doctor, lawyer, judge, government top official, investment banker, would you still LOVE DOING THIS JOB?

If no one in the world sees that you can sing/dance/act, would you still join the entertainment industry and try to be famous?

I want you to ponder on this Q today and reflect on what you have been trying to do/ get/ be…

…it will LIBERATES you from all the social bullshit and toxic ideas as to what you really want to DO/HAVE/EXPERIENCE in your life 🙂

It is a very interesting question to ask isn’t it?

We live in a culture where we see in TV/movies/media that men and women can have great, long-lasting friendships…

and in many cases, they eventually fall in love with each other and have a happy perfect relationship forever.

But is this true? Is real life happening the same as we were told? Feel free to comment below and here’s my take on it.

#1 In a man-woman relationship, there are 3 possible scenarios:

The first one is the man holds the dominant frame, he is confident, self-assured, and comfortable with women.

He sets the frame of how the relationship is going to be and often women just want to sleep & stay with him. That’s ideal.

#2 In scenario 2, (which is 90% of today’s dynamics) the man is a submissive beta who secretly tries to be the girl’s bf, while the girl holds the frame.

He will pay for things, he listens to her breakups & emotional dramas, he “protects” her from dating bad guys he doesn’t like etc.

#3 In scenario 3, the relationship is equal and there is no ST between both. But magically, both can date & fvck others, and the other party don’t get jealous.

Is scenario 3 possible?

I think so, as long as the man doesn’t find the girl sexually attractive and he doesn’t want to fvck her at all.

#4 However, many guys mistaken this with a situation when they are ACTUALLY SEXUALLY INTERESTED in the girl.

From my experience & observation,

when a guy is close friend with a girl and she is not fvcking him, it often means that he is secretly in love with her and wants to sleep with her…

when a guy is close friend with a girl and she is not fvcking him, it often means that he is secretly in love with her and wants to sleep with her…

…BUT since Day 1, he was too pussy to express his sexual desire that he pretended to be her gay best friend and WAIT for a better day when she finally see “how good a guy he is” and chooses him.

#5 You may now ask: If a girl doesn’t want to sleep with him, why do they still keep them as friends?

Or why do they say “they don’t want to lose the friendship when that guy finally confess his feelings”?

Well, it’s easy. The girl is enjoying a ton of benefits from the guy: He is taking care of her, he buys her stuff, he does her favors, he gives a ride for her, and most importantly, he gives her attention whenever she wants it.

#6 I also want to believe that men and women can just be BEST FRIENDS just like men-men relationship.

But we have to understand: Men & women naturally have ST with each other. If they are put in a room and no one knows, they are going to fvck some day.

If a guy is very close with a girl but isn’t fvcking her, 99% of the time is because he is a beta guy who feels shameful for his sexual desire to fvck her and put himself in the FZ,

and maybe just 1% of the time he isn’t sexually interested in her but for whatever reason just needs to keep that friendship.

What’s your thoughts? Are you close with certain girls just to stay friends?

Or are you honest enough to admit that you actually want to fvck her but wrongly chose the traditional friendship path?

CM below and let me know!

Bro, you have watched so many MTFU videos, and by now you should understand that attracting women is both a short term game and a long term game.

Bro, you have watched so many MTFU videos, and by now you should understand that attracting women is both a short term game and a long term game.

In the short term, you should develop that fun, carefree, nonchalant, passionate, adventurous guy who enjoys his life and welcomes women to hang out.

In the long term, you should be a man who keeps challenging himself in all areas of life, dominating your path/mission, and living with purpose.

When you become that, you will become a man she not only wants to fvck, but also a man she wants to love.

Below are 3 tactical ways that make you irresistible as a man in years to come:

#1 Never compromise your sex & love life

Especially with women, if a woman feels that “you only choose her because you can’t get others so you settle for her”, she is going to fvcking resent you!

So you should only go after women you genuinely like, who genuinely inspires you outside and inside the bedroom. When you know what you want and you take action to claim it, that’s always an attractive trait in a man.

#2 Stop hating “bad players” and start peeling off your “nice guys masks”

If you still hate those “assholes”women keep falling in love with, you will never LEARN the psychological reasons WHY they succeed but you fail.

Instead of seeing things in good/bad, try to see things in predictable/ dull/ boring and to exciting/fun/surprises.

Even though a girl wants a good stable reliable man who loves her in the long term…

biologically…they just can’t help but fvck a guy who is fun, exciting, non-needy sexual man who is comfortable with his desires.

You want to be the Ultimate Alpha? Then you gotta be a man she doesn’t just want to love, but she also wants to fuck!

#3 Never base your self-esteem/self-worth on girls, never!

A masculine man always validate himself from the inside, while a feminine woman always validate herself from the outside.

The day when you base your self-worth on “how much money you make/ how many girls you can penetrate/ how big your muscles are”, is the day when you fall into the endless loop of insecurity/consumerism where you always need to “get more stuff” in order to feel secure.

All those external things are like eating desserts, it’s good to have once for a while and there is NO NEED for you to live in a monk…

…but apart from enjoying these desserts of life, you gotta also have the WISDOM to know that a meaningful fulfilling life is MORE THAN just physical material pleasures…

If you follow the above 3 principles,

you will become that beast who can travels between the physical and spiritual realm of life and enjoy BOTH RICHES in the outside and in the inside. 😀

Yo brother, what is your favorite “opener”? What pickup lines do you find most effective?

 

If you are now researching for the best opener, OR do have a best opener, I guarantee you aren’t being the most attractive version of yourself.

 

Why? Because the best way to “open” a girl is NOT about “opener”;

 

And if you look for openers, you are focusing on the wrong thing.

 

What should be focus on? Great question, we should focus on getting her ATTENTION.

 

When you want to approach a girl, DON”T think how should I open this girl.

Instead, think “how can I get her attention?”

 

E.g. You want to stop a “moving girl”?

 

-> Tap her shoulder/grab her arm/step in front of her to GET HER ATTENTION

 

E.g. How to open girls in“mixed set”?

 

-> Tap her shoulder & get her attention, OR be polite to blend in with her friends first to indirectly get her attention UNLESS they don’t want to

 

Can you see how you are over-complicating the 開場白 thing when you focus too much on the WORDS YOU SAY, and forget the real purpose of getting her ATTENTION in the first 5-10 seconds?

 

So stop asking for the right openers, start getting HER ATTENTION in whatever creative ways you can and go from there!

I still remember many years ago, I started learning dating advice because I experienced a very bad breakup with a girl I “fell in love”with via long d r/p.

It took me nearly 2 years to recover, how I behaved was so stupid and wrong, but that pain motivated me to start learning the TRUTH about women, sex, dating and relationships.

 

So looking back, if someone asked me what weapons do I find most powerful to attract women, I think there are 3 valuable lessons every man must learn.

 

#1 Enjoying yourself and having FUN is so fucking crucial to attracting women.

 

“Fun”is the most undervalued weapon to get girls. No matter what game you play (daygame, night game, social circle game, text game, online dating), if you are NOT having FUN when you meet women,

 

it is very EASY to burn out yourself in your journey to improve your sex life.

 

So you have to find the FUN when you interact with girls in whatever place you meet them. If you don’t enjoy it, it’s hard to get good or be truly attractive.

 

#2 Becoming attractive is NOT “fake it till you make it”, it is about expanding your personality, owning your imperfect self and courageously expressing every good/bad, angel/demon, socially-acceptable/taboo of you with no filter.  

 

Because the truth is that the most attractive version of ourselves/ our True Self is when we were a baby, when we were NOT imposed so many social/cultural rules on us that limit our natural expression.

 

Our True Self is always curious, calm, confident, courageous, playful, present, expressive.

 

Becoming attractive is NOT about adding new layers, it’s about stripping off all the bullshit fake selves we now hold and let our True Self shine!

 

#3 Game is NOT about what you do, it is about how you react to what you and she do!

 

If you focus on what to do, you will always worry about “whether you are doing it right or wrong”, which guarantees you never take action and waste time.

 

However, if you focus on“how I react to whatever happens”,  you can literally can do/say whatever to women because you have the CONFIDENCE & SELF-BELIEF that “No matter what happens, I can handle it”.

 

This is a fucking powerful paradigm shift on how you view game!

 

Stop worrying about not doing it right in the first step, focus on how to playfully/nonchalantly REACT to whatever things she says/does to you!

 

If you get this, your game is going to be at least 10x more effective 🙂

If you have ever been FZed, you know how painful it is.

You are always with her, observing her, admiring her BUT she just never sees you as a sexual guy she wants to fuck or get together with.

 

Today, let’s explore the 5 common reasons WHY you are in this no sex zone and end up being an emotional tampon for her.

 

#1 Because you are operating as her little FAN!

 

What does fan do? They closely monitor every single move their idol do, and always following their 一舉一動。

 

If you are secretly observe her social media activity, liking her stuff, commenting her stuff, DMing her stuff, can you see WHY you are putting yourself in the FZ by being 1 of the 1000s admirer in her fan club that she is never going to fuck?

 

#2 Because you are like a fucking 招財貓！What does a 招財貓 do？It fucking nods its head!

 

If you agree with whatever the fuck she says, if you pretend you LIKE everything she likes/does, if you NEVER express your real raw personality that might offend her, can you see WHY she just can’t feel attraction to you?

 

#3 Because you are predictable as fuck like a boring movie!

 

No one wants to watch a movie if they already know the storyline, climax & ending.  

 

So if you are so scared of “making the wrong move” and just do “whatever that please her”,  you have to understand that your behaviors are so predictable that she is BORED by you.

 

And in a girl’s dictionary, boring = legs closed & dry = FZ you!

 

#4 Because you are buying her gifts like a fucking father.

 

You think a sudden gift is a romantic surprise? You think showing how 關心/細心 you are and rewarding her even though she did no shit to earn it is attractive?

Well, kindness is NEVER going to make her wet, otherwise girls will want to fuck the Buddha!

 

#5 Because you try to be a 白馬王子去拯救佢！

 

I know it’s deep in a man’s psychology to protect women.

 

But if you do these “saving acts” hoping she will see you as a 紳士勇士, if you always ready to listen to her problems,

 

if you jump on every opportunity to SAVE HER, I guarantee you will become a nice gay friend she THANKS but never feel the arousal to fuck.

 

So are you now in the FZ?

 

Great, it’s because YOU have put yourself in such submissive role as a friend, YOU purposefully hide your sexual desire,

 

YOU overvaluing her interests/opinions/ideas/problems/self-esteem while undervaluing your value as a man.

 

So tell me: Who is to blame when you find yourself in a FZ?