月份: 2018 年 12 月

We know that being vulnerable requires emotional courage, because letting ppl come close and see your flawed imperfect self is scary and can hurt you if you choose a wrong person to do so.

How do we protect ourselves while doing that?

#1 First thing to remember: We don’t NEED everyone to see the deepest, realest part of you.

Not everyone DESERVES to see that deep truth, and not everyone is INTERESTED to explore you.

So while we are being real, we give people freedom to go as deep as they want and freedom to stop at certain level.  

When you come from a place of total self-acceptance and self-love, we WON”T need others to validate us that“Oh, you really are flawed but I accept you”.

#2 You have to be choosy as who you slowly allow to enter your heart.

From your interactions with them, you need to see if they are a trustworthy, non-judgemental, patient, compassionate, kind-hearted person who has your best interest at their heart.

If they are supportive to your growth with open heart, then these people has earned their right to receive your invitation to go deep.

If they shame you for being/doing certain things, they are NOT safe people to open up.

#3 This applies to every kind of relationship – bf/gf, friendships, or you seek help from therapist or personal coaching.

The purpose of these “vulnerability sessions” is to help you heal from your emotional wounds in the past,

to let go of the toxic shame that controls you, and to reintegrate your disowned selves back to your personality.

So if you need help to open up, if you are scared about certain fears but you don’t know why,

if you have difficulties connecting with women, you are welcome to send an email to support@manthefvck.com to book a coaching session with me,

OR join our community MTFU Insider to learn and grow together as an integrated healthy male so that you become more attractive, powerful and confident human being.

It is safe, loving, compassionate evn where you will receive support in your journey.

I was recently having lunch with an old friend who is very successful in society’s standard – very wealthy, make multiple millions, have a great pretty gf, can travel anywhere anytime he wants –

and we stumbled upon the discussion on how to know whether our goals are SOMETHING WE REALLY WANT instead of what people want for us?

Take a second to think about this:  Is your goal right now something YOU want, OR society/marketing forces tells you to want it?

Your next car? Your next house? Your job? Your girlfriend? Your possessions? Your places to go because you heard it can take nice pics for your IG?

Then, we discussed the 1 Q we can ask ourselves to distinguish the REAL thing and the FAKE thing, and that is…

“If no one in the world knows what you do/ what you have, OR if you cannot show off what you do/what you have to the world, would you still continue doing it?”

Boom, can you see how liberating this Q is?

E.g. If you can’t show off that Red Ferrari or green Lamborghini to the world, would you still try to own it?

If you can’t show off this HOT SEXY MODEL to the world, would you still choose to attract her, keep her as a girlfriend OR like hanging around with her?

If you can’t tell your parents/relatives that you are a doctor, lawyer, judge, government top official, investment banker, would you still LOVE DOING THIS JOB?

If no one in the world sees that you can sing/dance/act, would you still join the entertainment industry and try to be famous?

I want you to ponder on this Q today and reflect on what you have been trying to do/ get/ be…

…it will LIBERATES you from all the social bullshit and toxic ideas as to what you really want to DO/HAVE/EXPERIENCE in your life 🙂

If you want to have a fulfilling intimate relationship, there are certain foundational rules that you need to follow in order to make it thrive.

#1 Everything starts from self-acceptance & self-love

Your r/p with the world is a reflection of the r/p with yourself. Your own happiness & fulfullment is always your No.1 priority, NOT your partner’s.

Most conflicts start in a r/p when you feel that your emotional needs are being met, so you need to take time off for your own rejuvenation REGULARLY.

If you don’t do things daily to LOVE YOURSELF (physically, mentally, emotionally, financially, spiritually), you’ll ruin your relationship!

#2 Seek first to understand, before you seek to be understood

Most people feel so much need to tell the world what they need, than they can’t stop and listen what others need.

Once you’ve spent time to take care & love yourself, you won’t feel a need for others to meet your needs and thus you have the EMOTIONAL AVAILABILITY to see/listen/understand who they are & what they want.

If you show up like that with your girl, she will feel loved.

#3 Have the courage to be vulnerable

Humans are NOT attracted to perfect beings, we are attracted to each other’s flaws and imperfections, that’s how we RELATE & CONNECT with others.

That means sometimes you tell your girl that you are afraid to do certain things, sometimes you be honest and invite her if she wants to listen to the truth,

sometimes you apologize if you fvck up,
sometimes you ask for help when you can’t figure things out,

sometimes you SAY NO to others politely if you don’t want to do stuff…

=> If you love & accept yourself, see first to understand, and then have the emotional courage to be vulnerable,

you will develop healthy strong bonds with not just your girl/partner but also other human beings 🙂

Hey bro, I am not sure how long have you been watching MTFU’s videos, or whether you are smart enough to study the old videos I have put out…

But if you want a guaranteed way to generate attraction with women, this secret I am about to share with you is fvcking powerful.

#1 Before I reveal, let me ask you: How do you know if a girl likes you? How do you know if you have successfully sparked attraction in her? How do you know a woman is seeing you as the prize she wants to chase?

Well, if you can’t immediately answer these questions, then you gotta understand this…listen carefully…

Whatever outcome you want to achieve with women – e.g. get her #, get her on a date, kiss her, sleep with her – …

when you ASSUME that action/thing is no big deal and it’s FUN to do, she will likely assume it’s no big deal.

#2 E.g. If you think it is a BIG FVCKING DEAL to kiss a girl on first date, you will unconsciously display all sorts of nervous/indecisive behaviors that convey you are NOT comfortable of kissing her…

then women will pick that up and also think it’s a BIG DEAL, and she won’t kiss you that night

Understand: How women feel about certain things/doing sth with you, often reflects how YOU feel about doing that thing with her.

When you ASSUME that getting a girl’s # under 2 mins is a big deal, she will have that ASSUMPTION too and feel that she shouldn’t give you her #.

#3 So what it means to you is this: Start assuming ALL the positive ideal situations will happen when you take certain ACTION.

E.g. Assume she is already interested in you, Assume she wants you to approach her, Assume she wants you to date you,

Assume she wants to fvck you, Assume she will do favors for you, Assume she is also looking for fun…

When you have this ASSUMPTION that what you do is no big deal, creating attraction will be so much easier, and you’ll a lot more likely to get the outcome you desire.

So let me ask you: Assume this girl is already wanting you, what actions would you take right now?

Try it and share with me the success stories later 😉

Hey bro, you do know we need to playfully tease a girl to increase her attraction right?

And you also understand that teasing doesn’t mean to insult her or make her feel bad about yourself right?

If you understand this, you will be able to see why flirting is actually a FUN thing to do with women just to enjoy these sexual tension, otherwise the conversation will become too formal and boring.

So if you want to know what it looks like to playfully flirt, below are some easy ways to flirt playfully:

#1 You playfully do stuff to annoy her as if she is a 10 years old girl

E.g. when she says sth, you repeat everything she says

E.g. In school, when she is walking to toilet, you keep blocking her from passing

E.g. When you bump into a girl on the street, act as if she is someone else lol 扮認錯人跟住玩嘢

E.g. She asks you sth, you first answer with something clearly exaggerated story

E.g. She asks you to do sth for her (can you pass me that tissue)… you pretend to do that… but as you hand her that stuff… you tell her now it’s her turn to give you a back massage … if she laughs or refuses…you pull that tissue away lol

#2 Another way to flirt is by your physical actions

E.g. She is about to sit, but you immediately sit down and steal her seat lol

E.g. When you walking besides her, slowly nudge her to another direction or push her away lol

E.g. (my favorite), during escalation in bar/club, grab her hand and put another guy’s butt LOL

E.g. Play thumb wrestle with her, pretend to be losing, then dominate her

E.g. Ask her to hold sth for a second … then once you’re done E.g. tie shoelace, then talk to sb else while she is on 99 holding LOL

E.g. Fake a high five, and leave her 77 hanging

E.g. Ask her to hand you sth … but when she gives you… you say “Nah I dun need it anymore”

#3 Finally, you can also do it verbally.

E.g. You make a few times eye contact with a girl, you walk over there and say 『我頭先見到你gup咗我幾次喎…我已經過咗嚟喇，你可以同我say hi喇』

E.g. A girl keeps appearing in your vicinity a few times, you can say “嘩又係你？做乜係咁跟蹤我？』

E.g. You chat briefly with a girl in certain environment, you later say “啊頭先我哋明明好好傾㗎，做咩冇勇氣搵番我呀，好失望囉…』

Bros, I believe you have more than enough examples of how to playfully flirt with girls, it is a fun activity you should enjoy.

As long as you do/say these things playfully, you won’t be seen as mean/hurtful to women and girls will LOVE IT!

In case you still want to learn more, email support@manthefvckup.com for more info regarding our advanced program MTFU Insider.

Hey bro, I’m going to teach you something more intermediate about attraction today. So if you are a total beginner, you might understand what I say later when you progress.  

So, you do remember the importance of NOT being a nice guy right?

And if you stop buying girls drinks for free, complimenting her, or being too agreeable, you do find girls start to treat you differently right?

If you have been applying what you learn from MTFU, you should notice that girls no longer treat you as a beta nice guy whom they can control/bully…

however, do you wonder why some women still don’t chase you even when you are a challenge to them?

#1 The answer is this: Stop presenting yourself as a nice potential bf is the first step, you did well.

BUT, if you’re not enjoying more sex, it is because you had shown TOO MUCH disinterest/coolness in her that she starts to think you are NOT interested in her!!

Most beginner guys focus too much on expressing disinterest/acting aloof, and they don’t even show her any interest indicators that makes a girl notice them.

#2 But you gotta understand: Attracting girls does NOT mean completely hiding your desire and pretending to be indifferent to her.

It’s more about expressing your desire for her with your nonverbals (occasionally verbals), BUT you are indifferent to the outcome/result.

So what you wanna do is to let the girl feel that you find her sexually attractive, but she also feels that you have a ton of other sexual options that if she doesn’t start to chase you, she is going to lose your attention.

#3 Next time when you’re gaming, I want you to notice the moment when you’re talking to girls and you sense that some flirting is going on, then at that moment try to use a statement to express your desire for her.

E.g. When you’re screening for her inner qualities and she is qualifying herself at the connection stage, you can look at her and say, “Ah…你唔單止性感啊下，原來你都算幾有愛心架喎”, with a smirk.

At that moment, you are building sexual tension and she will either giggle, become shy, or say something. After that, go back to talking normal stuff to release ST.

When you do that, you are using a statement of desire to increase sexual tension/attraction and inspires her to chase you.

That is one of the ways to escalate via your words, if you’re interested in learning more, email support@manthefvckup.com for more details about our advanced program MTFU Insider.

It is a very interesting question to ask isn’t it?

We live in a culture where we see in TV/movies/media that men and women can have great, long-lasting friendships…

and in many cases, they eventually fall in love with each other and have a happy perfect relationship forever.

But is this true? Is real life happening the same as we were told? Feel free to comment below and here’s my take on it.

#1 In a man-woman relationship, there are 3 possible scenarios:

The first one is the man holds the dominant frame, he is confident, self-assured, and comfortable with women.

He sets the frame of how the relationship is going to be and often women just want to sleep & stay with him. That’s ideal.

#2 In scenario 2, (which is 90% of today’s dynamics) the man is a submissive beta who secretly tries to be the girl’s bf, while the girl holds the frame.

He will pay for things, he listens to her breakups & emotional dramas, he “protects” her from dating bad guys he doesn’t like etc.

#3 In scenario 3, the relationship is equal and there is no ST between both. But magically, both can date & fvck others, and the other party don’t get jealous.

Is scenario 3 possible?

I think so, as long as the man doesn’t find the girl sexually attractive and he doesn’t want to fvck her at all.

#4 However, many guys mistaken this with a situation when they are ACTUALLY SEXUALLY INTERESTED in the girl.

From my experience & observation,

when a guy is close friend with a girl and she is not fvcking him, it often means that he is secretly in love with her and wants to sleep with her…

when a guy is close friend with a girl and she is not fvcking him, it often means that he is secretly in love with her and wants to sleep with her…

…BUT since Day 1, he was too pussy to express his sexual desire that he pretended to be her gay best friend and WAIT for a better day when she finally see “how good a guy he is” and chooses him.

#5 You may now ask: If a girl doesn’t want to sleep with him, why do they still keep them as friends?

Or why do they say “they don’t want to lose the friendship when that guy finally confess his feelings”?

Well, it’s easy. The girl is enjoying a ton of benefits from the guy: He is taking care of her, he buys her stuff, he does her favors, he gives a ride for her, and most importantly, he gives her attention whenever she wants it.

#6 I also want to believe that men and women can just be BEST FRIENDS just like men-men relationship.

But we have to understand: Men & women naturally have ST with each other. If they are put in a room and no one knows, they are going to fvck some day.

If a guy is very close with a girl but isn’t fvcking her, 99% of the time is because he is a beta guy who feels shameful for his sexual desire to fvck her and put himself in the FZ,

and maybe just 1% of the time he isn’t sexually interested in her but for whatever reason just needs to keep that friendship.

What’s your thoughts? Are you close with certain girls just to stay friends?

Or are you honest enough to admit that you actually want to fvck her but wrongly chose the traditional friendship path?

CM below and let me know!

Have you ever wondered why girls say they want a guy with a sense of humor who treats her well, but fall in love with assholes who use/abuse her?

Are you like my old self, who really hate players who seem to“hurt women”, who seem to be selfish, but women just can’t help but to stay with them?

You have to understand: The superpower these jerks have on women are not that magical…

the reason why girls are attracted to them is because of his bad boy characteristics.

＃1 What is bad boy characteristics?

It is definitely NOT those romantic, chivalrous gestures of buying her chocolate & flowers,  OR any long intimate conversations to “get to know each other”.

Bad Boy characteristics means you exude independence and confidence who does what pleases himself first.  

They have an attitude that“This is who I am, whether you like it or not.”

#2 Now you may ask, how do badboys create love in women if they care about themselves first?

Well, understand this: A woman only falls in love with you when she is away from you thinking about you.

Love doesn’t appear when you are with her, it often happens when you are AWAY from her and she just can’t stop thinking about you.

It happens when she plays the conversations in her head over and over again, it happens when she wants to Google and analyze your behavior.

#3  That’s why bad boy traits are attractive to women.

They are the ones who are emotionally independent, who proactively makes his life interesting and fun and thus gives her the time/space to wonder about him.

Bad boys don’t seek validation from women, so they don’t ask for permission/approval from girls to do things they love.

Bad boys exude sexual confidence, he already assumes women want him and he is actually helping her to get him by proactively chatting with her.

If you understand these TRAITS bad boys have, you don’t have to be really BAD or treat women poorly but still remain as an attractive male.

The Q is: Are you going to MTFU & learn these traits as a good man?

OR keep drinking sour grape juice and criticizing those bad guys who do get girls?

Bro, you have watched so many MTFU videos, and by now you should understand that attracting women is both a short term game and a long term game.

Bro, you have watched so many MTFU videos, and by now you should understand that attracting women is both a short term game and a long term game.

In the short term, you should develop that fun, carefree, nonchalant, passionate, adventurous guy who enjoys his life and welcomes women to hang out.

In the long term, you should be a man who keeps challenging himself in all areas of life, dominating your path/mission, and living with purpose.

When you become that, you will become a man she not only wants to fvck, but also a man she wants to love.

Below are 3 tactical ways that make you irresistible as a man in years to come:

#1 Never compromise your sex & love life

Especially with women, if a woman feels that “you only choose her because you can’t get others so you settle for her”, she is going to fvcking resent you!

So you should only go after women you genuinely like, who genuinely inspires you outside and inside the bedroom. When you know what you want and you take action to claim it, that’s always an attractive trait in a man.

#2 Stop hating “bad players” and start peeling off your “nice guys masks”

If you still hate those “assholes”women keep falling in love with, you will never LEARN the psychological reasons WHY they succeed but you fail.

Instead of seeing things in good/bad, try to see things in predictable/ dull/ boring and to exciting/fun/surprises.

Even though a girl wants a good stable reliable man who loves her in the long term…

biologically…they just can’t help but fvck a guy who is fun, exciting, non-needy sexual man who is comfortable with his desires.

You want to be the Ultimate Alpha? Then you gotta be a man she doesn’t just want to love, but she also wants to fuck!

#3 Never base your self-esteem/self-worth on girls, never!

A masculine man always validate himself from the inside, while a feminine woman always validate herself from the outside.

The day when you base your self-worth on “how much money you make/ how many girls you can penetrate/ how big your muscles are”, is the day when you fall into the endless loop of insecurity/consumerism where you always need to “get more stuff” in order to feel secure.

All those external things are like eating desserts, it’s good to have once for a while and there is NO NEED for you to live in a monk…

…but apart from enjoying these desserts of life, you gotta also have the WISDOM to know that a meaningful fulfilling life is MORE THAN just physical material pleasures…

If you follow the above 3 principles,

you will become that beast who can travels between the physical and spiritual realm of life and enjoy BOTH RICHES in the outside and in the inside. 😀

Bro, remember when I said that showing bf qualities to attract a girl you haven’t slept with is a huge mistake in seduction?

And do you remember why taking care of her, treating her well, listening to her problems and helping her solve stuff ARE NOT going to make her your gf?

#1 In fact, if you ask a girl why they are attracted to their BF at the beginning, and if they are honest, they will often say stuff like

“I dun like … he looks like the kind of guy who only looks for fun at the beginning… I didn’t really see him as a BF material…I thought we won’t last … but the longer I know him…the more I like him… I guess that’s how love is…”

#2 So, why showing BF qualities don’t work at the beginning?

It is simply because typical BF qualities only builds more comfort, and that will drastically kill all the sexual tension and thus she doesn’t feel the urgency to have sex with you.  

When you are trying too hard to find commonalities/rapport,

when you are siding with her badmouthing other players/jerks,

when you are respecting her too much to make a move…

YOU are no longer a CHALLENGE she wants to overcome and be close with!

#3 So what should you do instead?

You should treat every girl you meet as if you are just looking for short term FUN & SEX, even though you know that someday you might just want a stable GF or build a family…

You should stop listening to her problems and solving them for her…

You should stop being agreeable or compromising your schedule/life priorities so that you two can smoothly get along with each other…

Even if you really like her, even if she seems like a“good hearted Christian who never had sex kind of gf material”, you still need to STOP using the “good bf” strategy.

Good bf doesn’t get laid, and thus they don’t get a girl fall in love with him, the Q is are you still choosing to do it?